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Life and sloth of the party.

PostPosted: Tue Feb 10, 2015 6:58 pm
by Bill
A correspondent tells me there is a dearth of sloth jokes on this planet, which is odd considering how innately amusing those critters are. So here is a complete routine for you to use to bemuse the guests at your next house party.

Q. How do you put a llama in your fridge? A. No - open door, insert llama. (oops - went a bit off track there...)

A teen sloth was sashaying along the trail, bikini clad, off to the beach to get her full bask of tanning time in. From a branch above, a lecherous old sloth called down: "Hey, chicita, chicita, chicita - do you wanna hang around with me for a while?"

Q, How do you put a sloth in your fridge. A. No - open door, remove llama, insert sloth. (back on track now)

A sloth walked into this bar. "What would you like, sir?" asked the attentive bar keep. "I'll have a sloe gin, please." "You will have it at the same speed as everyone else!"

Q. Everyone turned up to the lion's birthday party, for, as king of the jungle, no one would dare refuse. Except one. Who was missing? A. The sloth stuck in your fridge.

As a sloth reached the base of his tree, before he could start climbing, a gang of snails set about him and gave him a right beating. He lay there groaning. About five hours later, a turtle arrived on the scene. "Sup, Bro?" he asked. "I got ambushed by the snail gang." "Come on, we are going to tell the cops about this." The police station was over one hundred yards away, so they got there about seven hours later. The sloth told the desk sergeant that he had been beaten up by some snails. "We shall get them, sir - but first I need a full report on what exactly happened." "Oh dear, that is quite hard to say. It all happened so fast.

Q. There is a ford across the river on your way home. The sign says "Danger - Crocodiles" What do you do about it? A. Nothing. They are all at the lion's birthday party.

Re: Life and sloth of the party.

PostPosted: Wed Feb 11, 2015 7:10 am
by Carrie
sloth5.jpg (141.25 KiB) Viewed 1326 times